that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
