dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
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