Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Randomize