How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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