Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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