you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize