If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize