Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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