I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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