What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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