i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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