Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
