If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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