I'm passing your future prison.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize