He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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