The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
