i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Randomize
