It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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