I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize