Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize