I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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