please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
