you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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