first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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