I think im going to throw up on grandma
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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