these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
