I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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