I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
