i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Randomize
