I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
