do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
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