I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize