that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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