her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
your like the ambassador to my penis.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
