She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
