How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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