Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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