just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Randomize