is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Randomize