She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
