So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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