was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
