You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
