So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
