Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german. http://tfl.nu/j5lm
  Replies (4) Good night (1133) Bad night (613)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  oh good, I think they're gone

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  the painters?

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  my herpes

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): oh good, I think they're gone (215): the painters? (860): my herpes http://tfl.nu/ob9r
  Replies (7) Good night (735) Bad night (1400)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  where am i from again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): where am i from again http://tfl.nu/9ocs
  Replies (6) Good night (2922) Bad night (544)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is. http://tfl.nu/aqok
  Replies (97) Good night (7850) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important http://tfl.nu/7wts
  Replies (36) Good night (17850) Bad night (949)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened http://tfl.nu/7n12
  Replies (8) Good night (4279) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat. http://tfl.nu/5cls
  Replies (5) Good night (5515) Bad night (731)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party http://tfl.nu/f5te
  Replies (7) Good night (3312) Bad night (703)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up http://tfl.nu/hzs8
  Replies (10) Good night (2629) Bad night (1242)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours? http://tfl.nu/0ch8
  Replies (13) Good night (4018) Bad night (1430)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium. http://tfl.nu/lfpo
  Replies (11) Good night (4598) Bad night (684)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls. http://tfl.nu/cfx1
  Replies (7) Good night (1992) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  Did you sleep with him again?

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me. (1-978): Did you sleep with him again? (978): No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me? http://tfl.nu/swvn
  Replies (5) Good night (380) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros. http://tfl.nu/gkb1
  Replies (0) Good night (566) Bad night (338)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed. http://tfl.nu/j4hb
  Replies (1) Good night (254) Bad night (342)

Randomize