fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Randomize
