Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
you win again, gameday.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
