I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
