I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
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