it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
