When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
the liver wants what the liver wants
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
