I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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